Maria Ellis grew up in a Greek Orthodox family on Long Island, writing songs before she understood that’s even what songwriting was, and by twelve she already knew what a room sounds like when it’s actually listening. After Berklee and her debut EP Ultrabaddie (2025) — confident, physical, candid — she moved forward: into a series of singles built around one relationship, from first attraction to the point of return.
On May first, “Relapse” arrives — the first chapter of that series. The track pulses with low-end drive and early-2000s melodics — Timbaland and peak-Britney territory — but reassembled through her own production logic: modern, dense, hooking you from the first listen. The subject is a closed loop: you leave, you understand everything about yourself, you come back. And the honesty of admitting the loop continues. We talked with Ellis about how this series works from the inside, why she needs to document a relationship second by second, and what happens when control over music becomes a way to manage anxiety — and then turns into a career.
photo credit: Devin Kasparian
Maria, hi! Thanks for taking the time. I want to talk not just about “Relapse”, although it’s obviously at the center of this — but also about how you arrived at this particular point: the sound, the way you tell a story, the way you’re building all of this on your own terms. There’s a very precise emotional mechanism in “Relapse”: you see the situation from the outside and still walk right back into it. It’s almost clinical clarity, but without any distance. Is it important to you that the listener feels trapped inside that moment, or more like an observer who recognizes themselves in it?
Thank you so much for having me and for your kind words. I want my listener to feel however they want to and take away their own story from it. As a songwriter, I have my own reasons and my own story tied to the music but a big reason why I love songwriting is because the listener can hear something completely different that’s related to their own life and experiences.
You talk about this series of releases as chapters of a single story. That immediately changes the rules, because now each song stops being self-contained and starts functioning as a fragment. Did you write “Relapse” already knowing where it would sit within that structure, or did the story itself only reveal itself later, once you stepped back and looked at the material as a whole?
I’ve been creating music nonstop and this just happened to be the song that tied all of the other songs together. I was writing a lot of love songs, and also songs about love falling apart, so Relapse felt like the perfect centerpiece to everything I had made.
The production on “Relapse” carries the shadow of the Timbaland era — those syncopations, the air between the beats — but it’s all filtered through a very restrained, almost ascetic lens. Was it hard to resist the urge to add more, or is the minimalism itself the emotional statement here?
I love Timbaland and Danja, the songs that they created really made me obsessed with music overall growing up. With Relapse, My producers Jackson Hoffman and Ryder Stuart also love that production as well, so it was more of a nod to the music we love while still making a song that felt very me.
You grew up in a Greek Orthodox family on Long Island, where your inner world and what you show on the outside are often two very different things. Do you think your music is a way to finally reconcile those two selves, or does it create a third space where that division stops mattering altogether?
That’s a great question. Today, I don’t believe that there’s two selves because my music and songwriting sound like having a real conversation with me. When I was younger, I didn’t carry the confidence that I have now, but as I’ve grown into myself as a woman I’m able to present myself however I want whether it’s on the stage or off.
After “I Like Me (When I’m Loving You)” — a track that sounds like an affirmation by its title but essentially calls into question the very nature of that self-approval — you release a song called “Relapse”. Are you consciously building this trajectory from the illusion of control to the admission of its absence?
I’m just creating songs based on my real life. “I Like Me” is a natural progression in a relationship where you enjoy the person that you are when you’re with them where as “Relapse” is created out of a natural feeling in a relationship that you’re trying to get out of.
photo credit: Devin Kasparian
You started building an audience through short clips, including a breakout moment with your cover of 24kGoldn’s “Mood”. But a cover is always someone else’s frame. Was there a specific moment when you felt you stopped proving you could sing other people’s songs and started proving that people needed yours?
What I love about the “If I had a verse” trend is that I can show up as a singer and a songwriter. I love that video and I’m so grateful for the audience that it’s given me. I love that the trend invites new listeners through a popular song, while also giving me the space to add my own spin on it.
You speak openly about anxiety tied to a childhood heart condition and about the loss of someone close to you. In pop music, vulnerability often gets turned into an aesthetic — a beautiful crack over a beautiful beat. How do you draw the line between being honest in a song and not turning your experience into content?
I love that question. From the time I was 6, I’ve been using music to write about my emotions and my life. Now, as I’m older I’m someone that is pretty protective over my own personal life. All in all, I like to draw this line between writing and saying whatever I want fearlessly but also not blasting every single detail into anything non-music related.
You produce, write, and control the process yourself — in an industry that still reflexively offers female artists “a team that can help.” Is creative control for you an aesthetic necessity, or is it in some sense a political act?
I love to produce and vocal produce. I also love having full agency over my voice and music. Most artists that have full creative control have a more authentic image and aesthetic overall but I just get so much joy from creating whether it’s songwriting or putting together visuals for the music.
Berklee is a place that simultaneously gives you tools and can crush you under an academic framework. A lot of people come out of there with flawless technique but lose the very strangeness that made them interesting in the first place. What did you take from Berklee, and what did you have to consciously unlearn?
I loved my time at Berklee so much. I learned and grew not only as a musician but as a person. The best lessons I learned were from my peers – watching them, writing with them, and making things that were outside my comfort zone. Additionally, what I had to unlearn was the idea of being underestimated as an entirely negative thing. Now, I use all of that as fuel to create and become a better artist.
We’ve talked a lot about structure, control, big questions — let’s end on something simpler. There’s a whole series of releases ahead, summer, a new chapter. If you could choose one place, one moment, one setting where someone hears “Relapse” for the very first time — what would it be?
Ideally, I would love for someone to first hear this in their car with the windows down on a sunny day. This song just exudes confidence and pure joy, so I hope my listeners enjoy this song anywhere they feel free!
All information provided is prepared in accordance with editorial standards and is intended to offer useful insights for readers. Please note that the opinions, interpretations, and evaluations expressed by the author may substantially differ from the viewpoints of our readers or the general public at large, and we respect the diversity of opinions.
